I'm getting the sense that God meant for us to spend the whole of our lives learning to trust God as we receive the revelation of the knowledge of Jesus Christ (and that He is THE Perfect Love that casts out ALL fear) (Eph. 1:17), we respond in kind by loving Him wholly and living the rest of our lives for His glory, and we do this by entrusting our entire three-part selves to Him -- body, soul (mind, will, emotions), and spirit. So this is it: we live so we can learn to love God more each and every day. We love each other as we come to an understanding of His love for us. The BE-ing (Loved BY God) begets the DO-ing FOR God... I can't help but feel I get this so backwards (well, I think much of this is the social culture we live in). We DO things FOR God so we can receive His approval, attention, affection, etc. And He keeps telling us, "Hey Beloved! You don't have to DO anything to earn my love! I died for you WHILE you were still a sinner, a God-hater! You do good works to fulfill My Purpose, Your calling and destiny. Good works is not a measurement of how much I love you. You can never earn my love. I give it to you fully by grace and through faith. I showed my love for you on the Cross. I paid the FULL penalty of sin. I held nothing back so that I could be with you. That's how much I love you." It's funny how many Christians come into the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ by grace, and then they go on the rest of their Christian lives forgetting the grace part and continuing in a slavish performance mentality, trying to earn the approval of God. The deception is so subtle. Of course, there is the opposite extreme -- the deception of Grace. Those who fall under this rut believe that EVERYTHING is covered in grace, so that means we do not have to "work out our salvation with fear and trembling," since "the grace of God" covers us. I think the problem comes with a lack of understanding or knowledge of who God truly is.

So to this end, I pray...Lord, release wisdom and revelation of the knowledge of Jesus Christ... show me WHO You are, God! Because I've known you for over 10 years... and I still feel like I really don't know who You are! I don't understand the FULLNESS of Your love for me... because if I did, I wouldn't have as many fears as I do. I want to know the height, the depth, the width, and breadth of Your love... I want to revel in this saving knowledge of Your love for me... not just for a moment but every day!! I don't want one moment to pass by that I'm not dwelling on Your Holy Spirit living inside me...

I realized that sometimes I go really extreme in my prayers... haha, I'm learning that I've got a tendency to be perfectionistic in my relationship with God. I've prayed prayers that leave me no room for error, and no room to be myself in Christ. Prayers like... "God, I want to be consumed entirely by You! Take all of me..." And not that it was a bad prayer. I just realize where those prayers have come from... a broken heart that found little value in myself. I figured, if Christ wants me, He's got to take ALL of me... because nothing good is found in me! But the amazing discovery I realized in the past few weeks is that Jesus loves me so much, He trusts me SO much, that He not only graces me with His presence and amazing good gifts (both spiritual and natural)... He trusts me more than I trust myself. I didn't realize (well, sorta but not really) that when Jesus said He wants us to surrender all of ourselves, He expects us to still keep our identity! Jesus is not a totalitarian dictator who takes control of our bodies. That's what demons do... they possess people as people surrender their will and mind to demonic powers. But instead, WE are the ones who possess the Holy Spirit. So while we STILL have our own WILL (the ability to make our own decisions and choices), we are moved by the Holy Spirit and act according to the Holy Spirit's desires as we remain attentive to Him and submitted (or yielded) to His leadings... He lives in us (2 Cor. 1:22). Praise God. Jesus is looking for Lovers, not mechanical robots! People who would lay down the love of the self and submit to the leading of the Holy Spirit.

THIS is what it means to "walk in the Spirit" or be "led by the Spirit" (Gal. 5:16-25). I like one of Justin Rizzo's songs... it basically refers to the fact that we are doing the works of the flesh or the Spirit, "we are doing one or the other all the time." It is true. And the thing we battle every moment is our mind. We are thinking things all the time... perhaps girls think more thoughts than guys... (I'm thinking of the movie What Every Women Wants and how women are always talking non-stop in their heads...)

The greatest thing I need now is to get into the Living Word -- the Scriptures, Jesus Christ. Sometimes this is a real struggle for me! I desperately want to study the Word, and I love it when revelation after revelation overtakes me and my mind is strengthened in Christ.... but I am battling my flesh constantly. Battling distractions of every day life... battling time... and it's definitely not easy. But I want to spend the next few months to go really deep in the Word of God. I realize how effective it is in conforming me to the image of Christ. In fact, it's impossible to become more and more like Jesus without going deep in His Word and spending time with Him. How can you emulate someone you hardly spend time with? And it's about spending time with Jesus... relationship, not obligation or duty! I know I sometimes have an obligatory mindset about studying the Bible -- I put it on my checklist of things to do... I feel guilty when I wake up late or I don't have that time... but I don't want to be compelled to do things out of obligation anymore. I want to be compelled by love. If I'm waking up in the morning to have "Bible study time," I probably won't be as enthusiastic to wake up. However, if I'm waking up in the morning to have "Jesus Encounter time," chances are... I'll approach that time a lot differently. And when I mess up, I'll not have to go through a guilt trip. I'll be able to say, "Jesus, you know my heart desire is to spend time with you. It's just that I love sleep too much! Help me to desire you more than my sleep." And with that, I go to bed, and I KNOW He will wake me up the next morning!

Ah, relationship with Jesus becomes easy when we begin to understand His ways and His desires for us. It's people that are hard to deal with! I'm coming to an understanding of the depth of His love, His kindness, His mercy, His patience, His grace over me... over my mistakes and failures. I certainly do need this revelation to be more gracious on myself and love myself more!

Oh, Lord! (Ps. 103:11-14, 17) As high as the heavens are above this earth, so great is Your mercy toward me! As far as the east is from the west, so far have You removed my transgressions from me. As a father pities his children, so You have shown me much pity! You know my frame, You remember that I am only dust before You... Your mercy is from everlasting to everlasting. You grant me righteousness because I fear You! There is no one like You! Praises to you forever, my Adonai

Pastor David wrote in an email that the Lord is purifying the Bride, His Church... and soon, the Church would be heartsick for Jesus' return to the earth...

I think I understand finally what it means to be "heartsick." I didn't understand that word previously. In fact, the connotation of the word didn't quite touch me deeply. How is one "heartsick" for anything? I suppose I never wanted anything so badly that my heart actually hurt for it. Now, I can say that I do hurt for the Lord's return. I long for it... more than food or water... More than living for another day... More than my next paycheck, or anything in this world! I would give up absolutely everything for the sake of Christ... is that what it means to be "heartsick"?

It's a glorious feeling, to be in love with Jesus. I can't quite understand how I lived life previously. It seems that everything has been drab and boring in comparison to this heightened love for Jesus. I can't quite explain. And my students are quite resistant to my prodding them to press in to Jesus. At least, it appears to be so! But who knows what the Lord is speaking to them deep within their hearts? And shall I step back only because of a few resisters? I have seen eyes clear and focused on me as I speak of the wonders of God's love. Surely there is at least ONE who would pursue Him with all passion and with everything that they have? That is my hope for my students. That they would be willing to give up even their lives for Him. For the One who is Worthy.

May the Lord burn in me and consume all that is within... every part of my flesh, that I would no longer live as one of the world... but as one who lives for eternity...

I used to be afraid of what others thought of me... whether I was "uber-spiritual" or a hypocrite because my life did not always match my supposed passion for Jesus. Well, after the Lord occupied more of my heart, suddenly the fear dissipated. This is not to say I do not fear anymore. It's just that when I turn to the Lord and seek His face, His approval, His love... I'm entirely fulfilled. I no longer care for other opinions. And so what if I am a fanatic! This is the ONE THING that is worth being fanatical about... and I'm going full speed ahead into the arms of my precious Jesus!

May I live for no other... May I live every day of my life consumed by this ONE Thing... in holy fire and holy passion for Jesus. There's nothing else in this world that can even compare...

Lord, bless this generation... may they come to see and know the beauty of Jesus. Who you are and what you desire for us. Bless each student in my classroom and every faculty / staff member... may they grow increasingly in the knowledge of Jesus and the divine revelation of Your beauty.
In Your precious name, Amen!

The Lord rained down His glory upon me at the end of 2008 and beginning of 2009. What a GLORIOUS New Years it was! I will never forget it as it was a life-changing moment for me. I am certainly not the same person I was in 2008. To have this confirmed by one of my students is great, though I don't need anyone's affirmation to confirm this in my own heart. I definitely feel a different presence within me. The Lord's glory burns within, though I have not been perfected in my outer body. There has been a glorious shifting of authorities within my spirit. The things I used to hold valuable and dear are now like worthless rubbish, as Paul says in Philippians 3:8-11:

Yet indeed I also count ALL things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him, not having my own righteousness, which is from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which is from God by faith; that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death, if by any means I may attain to the resurrection from the dead.

 I am certainly not seeing things the way I once saw them. Truly, I wondered what was wrong with me last year. I had been so spiritually dry, parched, during nearly the whole year of 2008. There were great moments where I connected with God, but something was so wrong inside me. And these glorious moments with God were so temporal. I couldn't understand why I was filling myself with worldly and fleshly desires when I know they don't satisfy! I kept crying out, "Make me want you more, God! I know You are BETTER! So why don't I want You?" Dearest brethren of the faith, if you have ever come to a point of spiritual dryness (who hasn't?), my word for you today is this: Do not give in to your emotions. Keep crying out to the Lord to renew your strength and fervor and love for Him. Even if you do not FEEL passionate for God or lack the discipline to spend time with Him, simply cry out to Him in prayer to make you want Him. He's so good! Beloved, sometimes He takes away our spiritual hunger to test and see whether we will miss it enough and will cry out and long for it. Another thing that breaks the yoke of spiritual dryness is Faith. Faith is activated by praising and worshiping God even in the dark when nothing seems to be going well. Even when you are in the darkest turmoil and you don't know how things will turn out, by Faith, if you will just lift up your hands and shout praises to God, His presence will come in like a flood. I use Psalms to help me when I can't find the words to praise. I also use worship CDs. Whatever works! Just do it! And I promise you, the Lord will see your faithful devotion and come right to your rescue. You can recite Scriptures to yourself and to the devil, and watch that Shield of Faith extinquish the arrows of the enemy! (See Ephesians 6:16)

James 4:7-8
Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.

Praise the Lord that He hears us when we call. All we need to do is cry out to Him and He comes down to our rescue. No matter how horribly sinful we were, He is an ever present help in time of need!

One of the greatest things in this day and age that causes us to turn away from God is distractions and busyness. I believe it is a demonic spirit that seeks to devour the precious time that saints need to get connected with God. In fact, the moment you decide in your heart to seek the Lord with great fervor, you will find several distractions that will try to deter you from your goal. Even doing God's WORK (ministry) can distract us from spending time with Jesus Himself -- the only thing that we really need anyway!

See Martha's dilemma here:

Luke 10:40-42
But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, "Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me."

And Jesus answered and said to her, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her."

I still recall the time when someone gave me a word from the Lord, telling me that I needed to be like Mary and not like Martha. A friend commented, "What? But Sharon is like Mary!" And I laughed because I had thought so, too! And yet, I struggled for years with this idea of what it means to sit and wait at the feet of the Lord even when a whole slew of things was waiting to be done. I truly believe it is an issue of the desires of the heart and whether or not we will ENTRUST the Lord with not just our time but our tasks and our work. Let's look at this Scripture more closely.

1. Martha was "distracted with much serving" - even serving God can be a distraction when it comes in the way of our inner peace (Martha was "worried and troubled") and we lose sight of God Himself as our source of strength and the reason why we do anything at all. We can evaluate whether we are distracted by the degree of inner peace we have in our lives throughout the day. We also have to ask ourselves: Are we coming to Jesus and receiving strength from Him? Are we prioritizing Him as the Greatest Importance? Or do we place our work above the simplicity of just being with Jesus, loving and being loved by Him?
2. Martha lacked Trust in God - She questioned that Jesus "cared" that she was doing all the work alone. She was "worried and troubled" and this is the greatest indicator of our lack of faith. If we are worried and troubled, that means we do not TRULY believe the Lord will help us or that He is TRULY with us and for us! So we need to gird up our Faith by spending TIME with Jesus. This will give us the confirmation that we need -- not just that He loves us, but that He is working in us and through us. In this place of peace and rest in Christ, we are able to conquer the day in His Spirit!
   
3. Dangers of Self-Reliance - It is evident that Martha was either doing things that did not need to be done (Jesus had not asked her to trouble herself over these matters) AND / OR she was working in her own strength (and not relying on the strength and renewal she would have received had she chosen the better thing like Mary). The key to Martha's syndrome we must understand and realize is Pride. The spirit of Pride is that which says to God, "I don't trust You so I'm going to do this myself. You aren't helping me, God! You aren't doing it right!" It is fairly easy to act in self-reliance without even realizing it or realizing the pride that is at the root of our hearts. That is why we need to come to Jesus regularly (not just in our devotions but throughout the day) and, in utter humility, say, "I need You to help me in this... I can't do this on my own! Show me how and give me your strength and divine wisdom." Even Jesus confessed that apart from the Father, He could do NOTHING! Imagine that! How much more we need Christ! (See John 5:30 and John 15:4-5)
   
4. Perspective shift: all about ONE THING - Martha's perspective was skewed. Her answer to the dilemma? Get Mary to help her out. You see how distractions can be contagious? I believe there are many Mary's who get distracted by Martha's ALL the TIME! If you are a Mary that gets distracted by Martha, be gentle, but say "No." Keep choosing the better thing, and that will not be taken from you. What Martha needed was a perspective change and a zap of reality from Jesus. Here's what He said to Martha: "Martha, the answer is not in getting more help from other people. The answer is in Me. You need to come to Me and find all that you need. When you find your strength IN ME, it will not be taken from you." There is only ONE THING that is needed. That's Jesus. Everything else that does not glorify Jesus will be burned away. If we hold onto this perspective, I believe it will be easier to discern the important things from the trivial.
   

I for one have decided to live the rest of my days for just ONE THING -- Jesus Christ. I want to live each day in greater and higher pursuit of the knowledge of Jesus Christ, of being fascinated and dazzled by His awesome presence, loving Him and honoring Him in everything I say and do, and drawing as many as would come into His presence to be fascinated with me.

Nothing else satisfies after one drink from His cup and one glance of His presence. He is a dazzling lover Bridegroom, righteous and merciful and wholly perfect as King, and awesome as Judge. He is absolutely and fantastically glorious in EVERY way. And I hope that I never stop gazing at His beautiful face for all the days of my life. He's that beautiful.

As I listened to Dwayne Roberts speak at One Thing in IHOP-KC, I was gripped by the conviction that when I'm not brimming with love for Jesus every morning and every night, there is something wrong with me. It's not that Jesus became less beautiful; it's that my vision of Him somehow got clouded by the things of this world. I have resolved to be a passionate seeker of the glory of Jesus, that NOTHING in this world would keep me from seeing Him as He truly is -- dazzling and stunning in beauty.

Beautiful Jesus...

Jesus had no servants, yet they called Him Master...
Had no degree, yet they called Him Teacher...
Had no medicines, yet they called Him Healer...
Had no army, yet they feared Him...
Had won no military battles, yet He conquered the world...
Had committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...
He was buried in a tomb 2000 years ago, yet lives today...

What a privilege to know Him and be able to serve Him each day...
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I finally watched the full length of Keith Wheeler's DVD, the one I got from WCC 2006. (Keith Wheeler is a man who went to the ends of the earth with a wooden cross to share about the One who came into this world motivated by love to set us free.) Watching the video, I became convicted. Keith's face was so lit by the love of Christ. One could tell how intimately he knew and walked with Jesus. He had compassion on every single individual he met, even those who pointed guns right to his face. I looked at my own life and wondered... how many times have I "met" with Jesus and then walked right on, going my own way? I realized how entangled I am in the culture of this world... I care more for my own agenda and hardly ask God to let me become a part of His. It's not about being hard on myself (at least I hope it's not), but it's about asking God for the grace to change me and let me not be so self-centered and self-occupied. I am so steeped up in knowledge and understanding from sermons, books, conferences, email newsletters... but one thing I realized I lack is that experiential knowledge of living LIFE with Jesus. Not just spending moments in the day with Him, and not just hearing about Him, but living the WHOLE of my life WITH Him... in His sacred presence, and enjoying HIM through and through.

This Christmas... the greatest present that I could ever receive is not just a revelation of Christ, but a living relationship with Christ that does not end after my devotions with Him, but that which carries me through every moment of my day... Lord, will You take me to where You are? Let me be a part of Your glory! Let me take in the fullness of Your presence... today and every day. Don't even LET me be about my own agenda. Impose YOUR will on my life, in each and every day that I live. Thank You for coming down to this world to endure the shame and rejection we laid on You... You took it up willingly, that we might be able to be with You for eternity. What a beautiful sacrifice You made. Beautiful Jesus, Wonderful Savior. Help us to forget ourselves and open up our hearts to receive You this Christmas.

LOVED this post... and as a sidenote, I would like to add:

Women, Pray for the Men In Your Life! That they would walk in purity, love, godliness, and humility...

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Sunday, November 16, 2008

Men, Protect The Women In Your Life